2.20.2010

Midnight Love Notes

Have you ever texted yourself before? I've heard some people do it when they're lonely and wish someone else would be texting them. This is very sad, in my opinion, in the sad of sad ways. But this isn't what I'm referring to. I text myself reminders all the time. If I think I'm going to forget something during the day I write it on my hand (causing blue and black smudges to crawl up my wrist and arm); but if I'm afraid I'll lose a thought just before I go to sleep, I'll text it to myself. Funny thing is, more often than not this occurs during that half-awake-half-asleep stage, at the time when senses and all logic are impaired, and consequently, when I receive the text (a mere fifteen seconds later) I often think someone is texting me. My first thought: "Who in heaven's name is texting me at this unearthly hour." My second thought: "Oh, it was me." Most of the time I think I need to save the thought because it is most genius and will naturally be the start of my first best-seller; however, my rested brain tends to have a different opinion of such notes by the next morning.
The disappointment I feel upon discovering I sent myself a text, and knowing it probably will just be deleted in the morning anyway, reminds me of how I felt when I finally read a letter I had written to myself. My primary class had an activity when I was nine where we wrote ourselves letters about who we wanted to be when we turned twenty. I actually took this seriously and held on to my letter--sealed--for all those years. I even forgot we were to open it when we were twenty and thought it was twenty-one, so I ended up waiting an extra year! Anyway, when I finally sat down to open it, I had built up so much hype, I'm sad to say I was disappointed with the discovery: "I want to be kind and righteous." I thought I was going to learn about my future career, the name of the man I am to marry, and the answers to all of my problems.

Moral of the story: I don't know everything.
....no, that can't be right.

New Moral: Don't give yourself advice when you don't know anything about how you are really feeling and the circumstances surrounding your situation.

1 comment:

Stephanie said...

haha. When I was 12 and just started young women's one of the activities was to write a letter to our future husband. It's suppose to be opened the night before my wedding day. I haven't opened yet, but so many times I've been tempted. It's going to be embarrassing, I just know it. Especially since I addressed it on the envelope 'to my future lover'. yikes....